house hunting naijafreshgraduate

Update On My House Hunting

I explained how I was finding it hard to cope at home of recent. And I ended that rant with a massive declaration that I was going to check 2 houses, both self-contained apartments, out the following day. Well, my mother found out and I never went house hunting.

And guess what she did.

She went to my elder sister’s place and, honestly, I do not know who put ideas in whose head but what I heard the following day ehn, I just had to kiss every thought of living alone out of my head unless I am somehow able to land a job in a place far, far away.

My mother found out about my plans on the day I made that post.

The following morning after devotion, she said she wanted to see me.

I was literally banned from house hunting!

Before she began, she asked me first if there was any other reason apart from the ones I have already been singing in her ears why I want to leave to live alone. I said yes and explained to her that I would also like to go on a diet which is just impossible in this house. We eat different swallows with soup every freaking day. I am busy enough already to have to cook two different all the time. Three, if you consider the fact that swallow and soup are two different things to prepare.

When I was done, she said I had still not given her any tangible reason to want to leave. She said my leaving would make her a laughing stock. That how did I expect her to explain to people that I was living alone.

I said, you’ll say it’s because of work, now.

She said, which work?

Here’s the thing. Until I wake up every morning and wear fancy clothes that I‘m going to a brink and mortar office, I DO NOT HAVE A JOB as far as my mother and everyone else, pretty much, is concerned.

That is just the problem here. No one recognizes what I do as a real job. Working remotely is not really working, you know.

Anyways, she went on to say that if I did go house hunting that day and eventually leave the house, I should consider myself family-less. And if anything came, like my wedding and all that, I should do it alone. Because to them, they never had a child like me.

Shey this is what they call disowning a person?

Last month, I had settled NEPA bill for the month. I paid for the sewing of my younger sister’s graduation gown. It was also me that paid for our meter to be changed when it blew off and almost burnt our house down in the middle of the night.

I was just wondering, how does she think I got the money to do all that if my job is not a real job? Or does she feel like if I leave, I would no longer support her?

So I decided that I will just ghost this month. I will be speaking I don’t have money until month end. Since I do not have a job, I don’t have money either.😏


Update: 7th June, 2019

Every morning, I sweep the outer kitchen and the backyard. Then I sweep the sitting room and the frontage. The frontage is very, very large! Then I go ahead to mop the floors of the kitchen, front of the kitchen and the sitting room. Then I go ahead to prepare breakfast.

My younger sister only washes the dishes.

There’s water in the tap. So that’s not really a chore. Anyone does that ’cause it’s really simple: just use the hose.

On Wednesday, I told my sister she’ll have to start sweeping the sitting room and the frontage.

Wahala started on Thursday morning.

I finished everything I had to do, including breakfast, and went to take my bath and start working.

My mother asked why the frontage was not swept yet and my younger sister said nothing. She was supposed to tell my mother it’s now her job. She didn’t. So my mother called me.

Basically, it ended that I was back doing everything again. Mostly because I was not satisfied with the ruling. And she asked me, what is supposed to happen on days when my sister is supposed to go to school?

This is someone that hasn’t been to school in weeks (she finished her exams).


I felt really bad, but now, I’ve made my peace with it. What I do now since Friday?

I wake up by 5:30 am and do everything, including making fire in the fireplace and putting bathing water on fire (which my mom used to do every morning). Then I settle in and nobody disturbs me. It’s peaceful, honestly.

Yesterday morning, while I was mopping, mama was preparing to go out. I overheard her telling my younger sister to go and sweep the frontage.

The girl ignored her and continued sleeping. I went and swept it anyway.

When I finished everything and went inside to take my bath, babe was still sleeping. She asked, did you sweep the frontage? I said yes. She asked, did you mop the sitting room? I said yes. She asked, why are you doing everything? I laughed. Lol…

And I’ll keep doing it. Because oddly, I’ve realized it gives me a certain energy to do other stuff. I’m more productive generally.

So there, finally figured. I’m not house hunting or moving out; girl is doing all her chores and a few extra ones. I’m quite sure there won’t be any more quarrels between my old woman and me.

And that is very, very peaceful.

I am a Nigerian graduate documenting the perks and pains of being a graduate without long leg in Nigeria; while also contributing her quota to make the world a better place. Lets be friends on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. You'll find me there as Naijafreshgraduate.


  • Oluchi

    Quite the opposite here. When I was back home, I basically did all the sweeping while my elder sis chilled. My younger brother does nothing and no one really sees that. We were all out of school and done with NYSC. And if I slightly pointed out that I needed a little help, I’d get a tongue lashing and a speech that would trail for days.

    So sorry about the death of the house hunting. The universe works in a funny way though. I’m pretty certain you’d have a legit reason to move out soon, and you wouldn’t even see it coming.

  • Darrell

    Aww… It’s so great to hear you found a way to be at peace with your mum despite the ban on hunting.
    Just keep it up as a mature young lady and you’ll likely be surprised soon enough by the results.

    In other news, are you sure your mum isn’t following the blog? She’ll just be steadily busting all your secrets 😂

    • Naijafreshgraduate


      I can swear down that she isn’t. Somebody that cannot even save number in her phone? 😂

      • Mary

        It’s sad that some parents won’t allow you make your own decisions. My mother basically said the same thing to me. That neighbours will start talking and thinking I’m a prostitute for living on my own. Very strange way of thinking. But anything that happens, happens for a reason and I believe something better is coming your way

        • Naijafreshgraduate

          You too, Mary. Don’t worry about what your mom said, either.

          Not too far from now, you’ll remember and laugh over it ☺.

  • Hafsah

    I relate to this on 15 different levels🤧I come home every weekend from my place of work and guess who cleans the room? 😒 I’m on leave and guess who is the unofficial househelp?🙌🏽

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