So, on the 31st Of July, I received a call for an interview for a teaching position in a private school. Apparently, they had sent me a text on one of the numbers on my CV, but being that that particular number was not in my phone at the moment, I did not get the text and missed the interview which was held on the day they called me. Because they did not see me, they assumed that I did not see the text and called another line, and told me to come the following day (please, make sure the number(s) on your CV are your main line(s) and that they are always in your phone. DO NOT BE LIKE ME!). Those following me on instagram and facebook must have seen my updates about this on there.
The following day, I got dressed in these 👇
Yes, all black! I was obviously mourning the death of my jobless status! 😎
I arrived the place at about 9am. I was made to wait a little as the person that was supposed to attend to me was busy with someone else. Since the waiting room was the same as the office, I happened to hear everything. The visitor was another applicant, like myself, and they were talking salary.
“So are you saying if we don’t have the amount you are asking for, we should not call you?”
The guy only laughed. And the interviewer continued,
“OK. This is what we do. When we employ new staff, we normally place them on a probation period of three months during which we would pay them the amount of 15k. If at the end of the probation period we are satisfied with the person’s performance, we would then review the pay to something higher.”
My head was doing gbam gbam gbam at this point. Like, for why? Isn’t that a form of slavery? I mean, we know how much private institutions in general squeeze work out of people. They want you to work more than you should but pay you less than they should and then expect you to be grateful for the stipends. Probation ke! What if they now say they’re letting you go at the end of the three months?
I ignored my racing heart and the voice that was saying, “NFG, so after everything you want to be a modern slave, ehn?” and waited for her to finish with him.
But the voice was not done with me,
“Tell me what you will do with 15k. No, tell me. This means you won’t be able to save anything o. And there would be no place for monthly shawarma sef. Just one shawarma in a month, mba. And be ready to be trekking with your legediz Benz to this place everyday. Even tithe sef, you think you will have the mind to let go of your hard earned #1,500 just like that? Better run. Better stand up and tell them you….”
Plenty talk. Plenty stupid talk. But I had to give myself sense by my self. Shey it is better to have that amount than to have nothing? So I sat my big, dark behind on that chair and waited.
When she had thanked the man, told him that she would contact him and excused him, she apologized for keeping me waiting and then called one Mr A to come and attend to me.
The man led me to an empty classroom and gave me this. 👇
I was supposed to answer all the questions.
OK. The last time I solved any math problem was when I wrote WAEC/NECO and I only wrote that exam once. Now, looking at these math problems, I knew they were simple, but no, I was not going to attempt even one because frankly, I was not sure I would solve any rightly. So I passed and went ahead to answer the other questions which I slayed mercilessly.
I was still writing when Mr A brought in another lady to write the same exam. Immediately she saw the questions, she shouted and asked me what it was and if we were supposed to answer all the questions. I said yes, but I was not attempting the first section. There was a jotter on my table which I was using to rule margin lines on my answer sheet. She requested for a piece of it and proceeded to begin attempting the maths. Even though I was calm on the outside, minding my business, I was rolling on the floor inside seeing the confusion on her face. Soon, she gave up. She was sha better than me, at least she tried.🤷
When I was done, Mr A led me back to the office where it was my turn to be offered 15k probation.
“I heard that you didn’t even attempt any of the math problems, Miss NFG?”
That was the first question that was thrown at me. What was I expecting?
“Yes, Ma. Because it’s been years and I knew I wouldn’t get any right.” I shot back truthfully.
She looked down at my CV held in her chocolate brown hands with fine, long fingers.
“Do you have any teaching experience?”
“Yes,” I said, showing her an updated version of my CV and pointing at the Nasarawa teaching during NYSC.
“Oh. So you have not had any experience with children of nursery or primary age?”
“No.” I was almost laughing out loud. I was obviously trying to not get this job. Haba NFG! “But I am willing to learn.”
“So how much are you looking at for salary?”
I told her.
“Upward or downward?”
“So are you saying if we don’t have up to that we should not call you?”
“Ehm, no. It depends.”
“OK. But are you open for the opportunity? And can you take other subjects? Apart from mathematics, of course.” She was laughing now, and I noticed she had a pretty smile.
“Yes. I guess so.”
“So now, what if we don’t have up to what you asked for?”
“Let me hear the offer you have first,” I breathed, smiling a little, knowing exactly what she was about to say next.
Then she went on to talk about probation and paying an amount “which might not be up to 20k” during the period. Then she said that that wasn’t the final interview and I might be called for the final one which the Director would do himself.
“We will get back to you.”
I thanked her and left.
After everything I somehow succeeded in doing wrongly, I knew they were not going to call me. Seeing those math problems had given me small headache so I was a bit grateful to have messed everything up. And then as if nothing could get worse, I had a nightmare about equations chasing me that night!
I am a Nigerian graduate documenting the perks and pains of being a graduate without long leg in Nigeria; while also contributing her quota to make the world a better place. Lets be friends on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. You'll find me there as Naijafreshgraduate.